Cleveland Pride

Cassie is a 18 y/o female, sharing her story: self titled: Love is Love. A lesson to everyone.

I was always taught that through God all things were possible. The aspect of blind faith has always been difficult for me, but I believed because there is no comfort greater than having something to truly guide you. There is no greater comfort then being accepted for both your faults and strengths.I always knew I was different, but admitting your sexuality in a christian family is never the easiest thing to do. So I ignored it. That is, until I met her.

She was in my grade, and I’d be lying if I told you I didn’t remember everything about the moment we first met. We were good friends for a few years, but there was always something more. It was unspoken love. Everything she did drove me crazy. To the way she would ramble when she felt un-comfortable, to the way she smelled. Everything she did, everything she was, was beautiful to me.

The first night I slept over her house I remember watching her fall asleep on my shoulder. I would never admit this to her, but I watched her for hours, wondering how I could care for someone that much. Wondering how the one person I truly needed and loved more than anything, was another girl. I’d always been taught that homosexuality was a choice, but I knew I didn’t choose this love, it just happened.

I ignored it, and we continued to talk every night for hours. It started getting weird though, and as we sat in silence I knew she felt the same thing I felt. Love. I asked her what was wrong, and she shy responded by saying nothing. I told her I was her best friend, and that she could tell me anything. She agreed, but was hesitant. I urged her on, and she quickly blurted out, ” I like you”. But for some reason, I couldn’t say it back. I denied the one undeniable thing in my life, saying that I didn’t feel the same way and that I was sorry. The only thing that came to my mind was my friends, and family, and what they would think if I told them I was in love with another girl.

I avoided her as much as I could for the next three months. I would see her in my classes, and avoid eye contact. I would walk by her in the hall, recognize the fact that she made my heart stop, and continue on to class. I missed her though, and the light she brought to my messed up and cluttered world.

We began to hang out again, and I knew I couldn’t run from my feelings any longer. We went to a nearby park and sat in her car.We sat in silence for nearly an hour, and simply just looked at each other. It was easy for me to lose myself to her, but I questioned if I was ready to admit that not only to her, but to the rest of the world. It all became too much, and I kissed her. I didn’t know one simple kiss could bring so much into my life, but it did.

I know longer cared about what the world thought, or my friends thought because I knew no matter what I would have [her] there, holding my hand throughout it all. I knew coming out to my family was going to be hard, nearly impossible, but having her there would make even the impossible possible. She allowed me to realize how strong I truly am, and taught me how to love with no boundaries. Everyone has that little bit of strength inside of them, but sometimes you need someone or something to reveal it to you because you are incapable of seeing it yourself. She allowed me to see, and even when I thought God frowned upon me for my lifestyle, she was there telling me God loves me for who I am.

Everyone sometime in their life will meet their own personal [love]. Someone who will push them, and allow them to see things they wouldn’t normally see. Someone who is their own comfort, and shelter, and light. It doesn’t matter if your Gay or Straight, Love is Love, and that is something that will never faulter.

Cassie
Age 18.

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The stories and opinions published in the Umbrella do not necessarily represent those of Cleveland Pride, Inc. The stories are published with little discretion so as to maintain the integrity of “user-generated” content of the Umbrella.